From My Inbox

The US troops in Afghanistan proved they have retained their sense of humor.

“YOU MIGHT BE A TALIBAN IF…….”

1. You refine heroin for a living, but you have a moral objection to beer.

2. You own a $3,000 machine gun and $5,000 rocket launcher, but you can’t afford shoes.

3. You have more wives than teeth.

4. You wipe your butt with your bare hand, but consider bacon “unclean.”

5. You think vests come in two styles: bullet-proof and suicide.

6. You can’t think of anyone you haven’t declared Jihad against..

7. You consider television dangerous, but routinely carry explosives in your clothing.

8. You were amazed to discover that cell phones have uses other than setting off roadside bombs.

9. You have nothing against women and think every man should own at least one.

10. You’ve always had a crush on your neighbor’s goat.

An oldie but a goodie! Happy April Fools Day!

In Florida , an atheist created a case against the upcoming Easter and Passover Holy days. He hired an attorney to bring a discrimination case against Christians, Jews and observances of their holy days. The argument was that it was unfair that atheists had no such recognized days.

The case was brought before a judge. After listening to the passionate presentation by the lawyer, the judge banged his gavel declaring,”Case dismissed!”

The lawyer immediately stood objecting to the ruling saying, “Your honor, how can you possibly dismiss this case? The Christians have Christmas, Easter and others. The Jews have Passover, Yom Kippur and Hanukkah, yet my Client and all other atheists have no such holidays.”

The judge leaned forward in his chair saying, “But you do. Your client, counsel, is woefully ignorant.”

The lawyer said, “Your Honor, we are unaware of any special observance or holiday for atheists.”

The judge said, “The calendar says April 1st is April Fools Day. Psalm 14:1 states, ‘The fool says in his heart, there is no God.’ Thus, it is the opinion of this court, that if your client says there is no God, then he is a fool. Therefore, April 1st is his day. Court is adjourned

These are worth a good chuckle. Unfortunately there is way too much truth behind each one them. My favorite…

Keep the change… I’ll keep my Freedom,  my guns and my money.

Do not enlarge your screen, just click on the link and see what happens!(Speakers on !)
http://users.telenet.be/kixx/

I just got my most recent newsletter from American Solutions.

Last week they started a campaign to combat the “Employee Free Choice Act”, which was submitted to congress today.

The newsletter states…

This bill would effectively eliminate our right to vote by private ballot when deciding whether to join a union, and undermine our right to freely negotiate contracts. It would also kill jobs in America when we need them most.

We need to stand together as Americans.. sign this petition and help stop the “Employee Free Choice Act” from becoming a reality. Our current Government wants to strip Americans of our freedoms one-by-one.

Take a stand and sign. I did!

Ain’t that the truth…

This one gave me a good chuckle. I’ve never been to a psychiatrist before (although many think I should have for a long time now), but I do know people who have. Go pay $80hr to a person, and they’ll do is repeat back to you everything you say.. just paraphrased… I don’t think so!

Read more…

Indian Chief “Two Eagles” was asked by a white U.S. Government official, “You have observed the white man for 90 years. You’ve seen his wars and his technological advances. You’ve seen his progress, and the damage he’s done.” The Chief nodded in agreement. The official continued, “Considering all these events, in your opinion, where did the white man go wrong?” The Chief stared at the government official for over a minute and then calmly replied: “When white man find land, Indians running it. No taxes. No debt. Plenty of Buffalo . Plenty Beaver. Clean Water. Women did all the work. Medicine man free. Indian man spend all day hunting and fishing – all night having sex.” Then the chief leaned back and smiled. “Only white man dumb enough to think he could improve system like that!”

I haven’t checkout whether or not this actually happened but I wouldn’t be surprised…
Read more…

My friend Malina emailed me this evening with a petition signing request for the immediate release of a California college student who was arrested in Iran.  Malina’s original message follows…

I try to keep these to a minimum, but since I just returned from a trip to Iran unmarred by any harrassement, problems, bad-vibes or run-ins with the Islamic Republic, this issue hits particularly close to home.  Given my overwhelmingly postive experience an arrest like this makes me even sadder than it normally would.  If you have a second check out this petition.  I don’t know very much about this woman but my advisor is on an important academic freedom commitee and they are supporting this petition drive so I know it’s legit and important.

check it out:
“Petition for the immediate release of Esha Momeni”
http://www.PetitionOnline.com/EshaM/

Thank you for your support.